The Grotesque (and Beautiful) Journey of Caterpillar to Butterfly

I don’t know if it’s because I have been seeing so many butterflies lately or because I myself feel like I have been in one massive transition after another for the last couple of years, but lately I have been obsessed with the caterpillar to butterfly  journey.

How could I not be? It’s one of the most treasured and used metaphors around personal transformation besides the phoenix rising from the ashes.

This wriggling, squishy, emorphous blob with legs suddenly goes into a caccoon and emerges as the symbol of metapmorphsis: the butterfly.

Sounds like magic, right?

And in a lot of ways it is because nature in itself is magic.

But do you actually know what happens when the caterpillar goes into a caccoon?

First off, that cute little caccoon that we see the caterpillar go into? It’s not actually a caccoon - it’s its own skin that rips in half, sheds and then turns into the casing that we see, which is called a chrysalis.

From there, it gets pretty gruesome.

After this chrysalis is formed, an enzyme is activated called caspases that dissolves *all* of the caterpillar’s cells in its muscles and organs, leaving behind only the vital life-supporting cells.

The caterpillar essentially self detonates, filling the chrysalis with its own goo.

It’s from this point that a group of specialized cells called imaginal discs get activated, get to work and begin the process of creating its new body and wings.

When the butterfly eventually makes it through this process, it leaves its chrysalis  and leaves behind a goeey fluid which consists of the waste that was produced during this process, including the bodily fluids that the butterfly no longer needs.

So yeah……there’s certainly magic but honestly it’s pretty grotesque.

We glorify this journey from the caterpillar to the butterfly when we are reframing intense transitional times in our life as we shift from one form to another or from one life to another……..but we don’t always acknoweldge the true process of not just what happens with the insect but what happens to us.

It’s really beautiful to think of our transformation journeys as going from the wriggling caterpillar to the gorgeous butterfly but the reality is, as seen above, is that it is a true death process.

During life transitions, we must metaphorically die if we want to become our own Butterfly. We must go to goo.

Just as the caterpillar sheds its old skin, so must we begin to shed the old patterns, beliefs and behaviors that keep us stuck in relationships, jobs and environments that we have outgrown.

Just as the caterpillar goes into its chrysalis, unsure of what will happen next or when / if it will even emerge, so too must we go within and trust our own process…….even when there is no clear sign or guarantee of what’s on the other side.

Just as the caterpillar dissolves itself into only its basic vitals that will keep it alive, so too must we be willing to be reduced to our core; to only the most essential aspects of ourselves.

Just as the caterpillar has no choice but to surrender and trust what its body is doing, so too must we surrender and trust the signals from our body and where they are guiding us.

And finally just as the caterpillar emerges from its chrysalis, leaving behind all the waste and debris from its journey, so too must we emerge when our time comes and leave behind all that we have shed during our own journeys.

There is a higher force acting here. There is a sacred code instilled in the DNA of a caterpillar that knows exactly when its time to activate the enzymes that will turn it to goo and that same code knows exactly when to activate the cells that will build its new body.

Like I said, there is much magic here with these insects just like there’s magic in our own personal process.

But there’s also equal parts surrender, courage and trust.

Surrendering to the journey, even if we don’t understand what’s happening or where it’s taking us.

Courage to continue down the path of the unknown, especially the parts we must walk alone (although Spirit is always with us, so we are never truly alone) and the courage to leave the old versions of ourselves behind.

And Trusting the Divine Timing of it all - metamorphisis takes time and that time is unique to each living being. It cannot be rushed nor can it be intellectualized; it can’t be "figured out", it can only be lived moment to moment.

So if you’re going through a major life transition right now, I am thinking of you. I know it’s far from easy and I know how scary / isolating it can be but I promise you’re going to be ok.

You’re going to be more than ok - you’re going to be magnificent (hint: you already are).

Just like the caterpillar, you will emerge from your chrysalis with new big beautiful wings to fly.

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